Disappointment

Today I am feeling down in the dumps. It's my weekend to work and be on call all week but that's not it. I went for my u/s and b/w today. I was thrilled to see my scan. I have 3 follies on the right, around 13mm each and one on the left at 14.5mm. I am usually around 16mm at this point, at least I was with the last 2 cycles. This is the most follicles I have had at once all around the same size. My estradiol (E2) level was only 120. That's kind of low. The RE on call today left me a message that my estradiol level was "great"(who's he kidding) and I should continue my Follistim at usual dose and come back Monday for another u/s and labs. I so wanted to have my IUI on Tuesday. I was expecting to see an estradiol level of 400-600. It' s supposed to be 150-200 per maturing follies.
This is the first cycle I started using my thighs as injection sites instead of my belly. I think I'll go back to my belly. I know that your body can react differently each month to the meds. Maybe it's just coincidence that my first 2 cycles were identical.
Follies grow about 2mm a day. Hopefully I will see an 18mm and maybe some 17mms that will have time to catch up on Monday. Fingers are crossed. I feel pressured into getting this cycle over so I can start the last one and not have it interfere with the weekend we are going away with Chris's family next month. I haven't made any plans to go anywhere or take anytime off of work because of all this IF stuff. It's starting to get to me. Even though I sat out last month, I didn't really get away. This trip in September is eating away at me on the inside. I don't want to disappoint my mother-in-law (MIL). She's been planning this trip for a year now. You just cannot make any plans to go anywhere away from home with IF treatments. It's so unfair. You need to be available for an U/S and labs when your ovaries say so. UGH!! I need to shut it out of my mind right now. I'm done here for now.